A Bahraini Wedding

I had several friends get married over the summer, and now I’m hearing about more and more of them that are engaged. I’ve only been here for a little over three months, and I just went to my first wedding here! Now it really does seem like everyone is getting married…

From what Dana told me about traditional weddings and how hers was set up, the night that I went to celebrate with her was actually a more modern wedding and then the second night was what a more traditional wedding would be. I couldn’t go to that one because I was singing in concerts. So, Alison and Jena (RCA volunteers) and I went on Thursday night. We weren’t exactly sure what we were getting ourselves into, because it wasn’t like the bridal party that we had been told about, where the women do themselves up and wear evening gowns, but we still didn’t really know exactly what to wear. We did our hair up and threw together outfits. The event that we attended was like a wedding reception and it was right at Dana’s house. The house was decorated on the outside with large strands of lights. We went inside and were greeted by Dana’s older sister. The only people there were Dana’s female relatives, and some of them were very distant. Still, the house was full of people! We were the only non-Arab people there, but I didn’t feel like a minority because Dana’s family was so accommodating.

We were shown to an area where there were couches and given strong tea. Female relatives kept pouring into the room wearing their abayas (long, black traditional dress), but many of them did not have the hijab (head covering) on. There was a woman on the floor in one of the rooms singing into a PA system with tons of reverb. She might have been an imam, someone who does the call to prayer. I kept hearing her say “Moh’d” at the end of several songs, so I wasn’t sure if they were spiritual songs or not. It’s difficult to tell because Arabic words have tons of letters/vowels when they are spelled phonetically, but when Arabs actually speak, they run those words together. So it actually sounded like she was saying “hommed.” You can imagine that this is quite confusing for me, someone who knows hardly any Arabic, especially when my students do it!

We were there for about an hour before Dana came. Right before she came in the room, all of her relatives put on their hijabs and zipped up their abayas. The young med student that I was sitting next to, who came from Saudi Arabia, was hardly recognizable! Then, Dana’s new husband escorted her down the stairs. Yes, Dana’s entire family covered up for ONE MAN, who is now technically a family member. It’s quite different to experience these traditions!

Dana was wearing a white strapless dress, just like any of my friends who were married over the summer wore. She had intricate henna designs on her hands and upper chest. (Henna is something very traditional here. Women put designs on before weddings and during special celebrations, like Eid. It’s basically a dark dye that eventually washes/wears away.) She also had a tiara on her head, and lots of matching cubic zirconium jewelry. Arabs tend to be very decorative when they are dressing for special occasions like this, and they always wear tons of makeup. Dana’s face was definitely made up, especially her eyes!

After Dana and her husband came down the stairs (kind of like in Cinderella), they sat at a specially decorated place in the room I was sitting in and the photographer took all kinds of pictures of them with relatives and friends. Although I got pictures with her, I don’t think it would be appropriate for me to place them on this website, because her head was uncovered. But you can imagine that she was very beautiful!

Once Dana was there, we started our meal, which was traditional Middle Eastern food. I didn’t have too much of it, though, because it was already 10:30pm, and I was fading fast! (Remember, we had worked all day that day!) I always like a good hummus and taboule, though, so I did have some of that. ;) After eating some of the appetizers and wishing Dana well, we had to leave because our taxi arrived at the house. We left before they had the cake, and I realize that this is generally a faux pas, but our taxi had arrived and here you have to book taxis ahead of time. Dana’s relatives all really wanted us to stay, too. They told us they were going to have dancing and were so welcoming. One of her relatives even offered to drive us home, because she was also leaving! Unfortunately, we couldn’t stay and I would have liked to have seen more of the celebration, but we were all pretty tired by then anyway. Overall, Dana’s celebration was a joyful occasion and I’m really glad that she invited me because it gave me a glimpse of Arab culture that I might otherwise not have had. Her relatives were so accommodating, and really made me see what it means to truly be a good hostess.